Dr Bowser's Clinic
by MinecraftOver9000
Summary: Bowser has decided to open a clinic in Station Square so he could gain a good reputation. Let's see how he'll survive the many challenges like the Koopa Bros. Protoman's rambling and Ganondorf's horrible skill as a nurse and many more parols!
1. Chapter 1

This idea came to me while reading Waluigi's Taco Stand and Life at PizzaHut by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus. I think it is pretty interesting myself. That author has inspired me with this idea.

Disclaimer: I do not own any material mentioned and I don't own any of Yoshi's material

A/N: Love your work Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus!

It's a beautiful morning in Station Square and Bowser just arrived there by train. It was time to put aside his evil ways trying to kidnap the princess and all. He wanted to open up a small clinic right in the middle of station square in hopes of having a brighter reputation and future. He shook his head and sighed as he entered the small building, with a cute red cross on top, which was to become the dawn of a new era. Dr. Bowser's Clinic!

"WELCOME TO CENTRAL PARK!" said an annoying woman announcer.

Bowser walked back out, already dressed up in a white coat "The hell?" He glanced towards his right perceiving an elevator leading to a funhouse in mid-air. He read the sign at the bottom of the elevator "Central Park?"

A lady walked in with a little girl "WELCOME TO CENTRAL PARK!" Exclaimed the announcer again, causing Bowser's ear to bleed (metaphorically).

He face palmed and sauntered back into the clinic. "Why did I do this? Just why?"


	2. Chapter 2

It has been a full twenty-four hours since Bowser has opened up the joint and not a single injured soul.

"Hmm...Maybe charging $150 a visits too much..." He pondered on that subject and decided "Maybe it should be just a hundred-"

slamming the door open came in the ones and only... "HI-TAAA! Here come the Koopa Bros.! Uh-huh! Oh yeah! Were the coolest of cool!" The Koopa Bros. dashed in seeming all injured. They trampled over each other in pain.

"Damn...that's a good intro WAIT A SEC! What are red, black, green, and yellow ninjakoopa doing here? I'm not that desperate for money!"

Red posed, pointing a finger at Bowser "We're here!"

Black did the same as Red "To drink!"

Yellow followed "Some beer!"

Green finally went "Get used to it!" Their fingertips shinned while saying in unison"We're here to protect your new Koopa Kingdom!" then they stopped posing.

Bowser was breath-taken by the performance but shook it off " You dimwits are still at it? It's over! This isn't my new kingdom...for now... and why are you really here?"

Red looked back at the other three and then looked back at Bowser. He then stepped up and confessed "We kinda went into the super popular bar your son, Roy Koopa, owns and got our asses handed to so that's why we're here..." They stared at Dr. Bowser intently.

He sighed as he crossed his hands "Yes I can medically help you with your injuries..." He pulled out his clipboard of appointments "That'll be $400" They stared a bit with rage then willingly said "Fine..."

Bowser then thought 'My first customers are these idiots... Why?'

"WELCOME TO CENTRAL PARK!"

"SHUT UP!"


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Don't worry everyone Wario WILL make his cameo... IN STYLE!

Bowser counted some money as a family of 30 just checked out. $3000! "Hahahah! Who knew those koopa mines would come in handy..." You see what happened was that the family were playing tug-of-war in the Mystic Ruins, near Tail's workshop, and it ended up triggering a mine below them. He completely forgotten why he placed them but a mullah IS mullah. Bowser placed the money in a safe evilly grinning.

Out of the blue, the Koopa Bros. ran in waving their arms around "Oh mighty one! There's a fat greedy man outside wanting to infiltrate!" Bowser glanced around noticing some patients, who were waiting to be attended to, raised eyebrows at the situation. Bowser cowered behind a table "You idiots are causing a commotion!Just let him in..."

A tubby and stalky man came in. He had a moustache shaped kinda like a W and had on some purple overalls. He fixed his tilted and familiar yellow hat " It's a me Wario!" He held out two peace signs.

Bowser squinted his eyes "What do you want you greedy pig?"

Wario walked up to Bowser's desk and did his typical laugh "Wa-hah-hah-hah! Why I'm here to tell you that I'm going to sponsor you!"

Bowser wasn't convinced "I just opened this place two days ago. Why would I already want sponsors?" Wario was worried cause he had no excuse... AHA! He positioned himself in Fartmode [Fart meter=100%] He started glowing dark greenish-brown. (A/N: Just imagine wario fart in Smash Bros)

"Hey Dr. Bowser sir I just finished posting the HELP WANTED sign and I think I may be interested in that-" Yellow walked in when he was demolished by the ultimate hydrogen bomb...

For the rest of the day, the clinic was condemned for radioactivity. Ambulances arrived to pick up the now even more injured patients, including the Koopa Bros.

Bowser shook his head, looking at the scene "Why'd you have to do that?"

Wario patted him on his spiky coat "Reason 1: Even in catastrophes..." He points at his unharmed body "The clinic cures you to good hea-"

"But I didn't even cure you" He waited for a response.

"Shh doesn't matter and reason #2 I got the Koopa Bros. out of your shell" He grinned, full of greed.

Bowser simply said "seems legit... Welcome aboard new sponsor!"


	4. Chapter 4

Bowser stares at the entrance, waiting for money to waltz right in. SLAM! The entrance door flings open to reveal a very sinister being standing before him. Bowser said in disgust "Ganondorf…" They both stare intensely while sparks flew from eye to eye.

Suddenly Ganondorf broke the silence with a smile "Hello old friend" He grinned widely and held his arm out. Bowser slowly reached out and shook it.

He immediately inquired "What makes you come here? Are you in need of medical attention?" Bowser noticed he was in perfect condition.

Ganondorf's grin fainted and a shameful expression plastered his face "Well…You see…" He hesitated "You see I kind of tried to destroy Hyrule a few times, killed countless people,etc,etc. So instead of being banished or executed I was put in community service for 10,000 years".

Bowser felt pity "Oh I feel bad for you man"

Ganon continued "and I have to spend it working here" He regained his grin "when they say FOR ALL ETERNITY… its just 10,000 years!" He laughed at the stupid logic.

"Now I'm feeling sorry for me…" Bowser looked down then felt a cold evil hand on his shell

"Don't worry buddy! It'll be fun!" Ganondorf was smiling, full of happiness.

"My reputation's ruined if he's here" Bowser sighed "First, the KoopaFags… now Ganondork… What next?"


	5. Chapter 5

A/N:Yoshizilla, Madz the penguin and Phantom: There is going to be a rival for Bowser real soon and some smash characters are gonna visit from time to time. Thanks for the reviews!

"Ow!" Yelled Sonic as he was being smashed in the head with a hammer. Rings flew everywhere in the operating room he was in.

"You really should talk with your creator about that ring problem." Sonic apparently had a huge bump on his head. Our main star Bowser got curious on what could've happened "What happened?"

"Amy...and her hammer..."

"Jealousy?"

"Yep...YOW!" Bowser whacked the bump again, making it go back down.

"You need to tell that whore that Sally's the way to go" Sonic then looked up in agreement

"Youre right! I'm going to shove that hammer up her-"

"Yeah, yeah buddy now go Sonic boom out if here already!" He ran out, accidentally bumping into some bomb-bomb... Boom! *Sprinkler system activated* " Why is this place not in Ripley's book for 'Weirdest Clinic'?" Bowser deactivated the sprinklers while watching Ganondorf scare patients away. Bowser then sighed, deciding to join him. Ganon was confused at his decision.

"Wait if you join me wouldn't that ruin your whole 'good reputation act'?" He was anticipated for a response.

Bowser looked up at Ganondorf's disgusting beard "I already didn't meet today's quota cause of the sprinklers plus I guess I can goof off once in a while... so what the hell!" They both glanced at the people, who still haven't left and were soaking wet. Ganon pulled out a skinny orb in form of a smash

"Wanna party?"

"I'm not that desperate for power!"

"Suit yourself..." He absorbed the orb, turning into the powerful demon Ganon. People started to faint while being bashed by him. Bowser ran out of the clinic as his head was almost swiped off.

"Why did he have to get stuck here?" He sadly watched his clinic being torn apart. The next few hours were just a bunch of suing reports that Bowser needed to complete. "I can't complete all these! The rest are going to Ganondorf's sentence!... Wait that'll mean he'll stay even longer!" He pondered on what he could do... "Aha! I'll just have to call up Phoenix Wright..." He ended up losing two days worth of his quota. "I'd rather have the Koopa Bros. around... and that's saying something. Where are you Koopa Bros.!" He yelled out towards the sky. Calling out for the Bros. is blasphemy! Oh and Ganon's community service was extended another 1000 years... You really should feel sorry for him by now!


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Took your advice and moved this Fanfiction to super smash bros... I can't believe I didn't realize how obvious it was to put it there -_-

Bowser's attention turned to the entrance as Wario entered attempting the moonwalk, SUCCESS! He announced

"Its time for global domination!" All the patients, sitting and standing, glanced at Wario. Sonic, obtaining a bigger bump, squinted his eyes suspiciously while pulling out the 7 chaos emeralds. Wario noticed them and quickly reacted "Hahah! Not like that of course! I mean through advertisement! A commercial..."

"No!" Bowser crossed his sleeves as Wario stared into his cold koopa eyes "I said no" Ganondorf popped up with glee.

"Did I hear Global?" Bowser turned to him in annoyance.

"Shut up I own you!"

"Oh hell nah! You know what? I'm gonna go tweet about your SECRET FOLDER..." He ran off towards Bowser's laptop, located in the storage/back room. He heard some typing from it.

"Well, there goes my chance at a brighter reputation... but that won't stop me from having a brighter future in this clinic!" His eyes burned with passion while Wario was still posing after saying 'Domination' Sonic put away the emeralds then face palmed at the theatrical stage.

"You guys are bigger idiots than Eggman's goons" Bowser saw Wario stuck performing the pose and clawed him right through the face.

"Wake up you fool!"

"Huh? Oh yeah!" He grabbed one of Bowser's arm "come with me reptile... this commercial will make your business earn millions!" He dragged out the only available doctor in the clinic back to his warioware company (tm). Ganon suddenly appeared in the front

"That should ruin his reputation... HELLO!" He didn't see Dr. Bowser anywhere and laughed happily "Time to fill in for the doctor..." The Koopa Bros. (finally) came back from the hospital. They saw Ganon picking up Sonic and smashing him through a coffee table. Red pointed at him

"Who's that?" Black then pointed at Sonic

"And that?" Yellow stared at the three other koopas

"Who're y'all?" Green guessed

"Amnesia?" Ganondorf spotted them and stomped over to their location

"Do any of you know any fun games?" He cracked his knuckles. The Bros. sighed in unison

"We're boned" It was reported to be the worst game of Twister ever played... gruesome.


	7. Chapter 7

Bowser was playing some RuneScape on his Laptop. Ganondorf was watching him get whooped by a five year old boy.

"Hah! You suck son! Watch this!" He pushed Bowser aside and took over "Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, Start!" Bowser's stats went from lv.6 to lv.50. Bowser was in shock.

"How did you do that?! You cant just use the konami code on this" Ganon just laughed at his assumption.

"Well its all according to the author of course! Its his logic..." Bowser was now confused cause he didn't know I'm controlling this. He shook it off then felt satisfied,

"Well, thanks anyway I can always count on you... most of the time that is"

"Hey I thought the point of this clinic was to bring in hurt customers... so I did" He grinned innocently.

"True... plus I got 3 months worth of work in the safe!" Ganondorf remembered about Bowser's commercial.

"Hey how's the comer-"

"Don't wanna talk about it..." He kept playing RuneScape while Ganon ran to the front to check up on it. The Koopa Bros. were calling up patients one at a time. Red announced.

"Sonic to room #1" Sonic rolled his wheel chair to the room and Ganondorf followed.

"He's my patient today..." Green felt bad for the guy.

"That Ganon really laid a number on Sonic." Yellow thought

"Maybe he has a personal problem against him?" Red exclaimed.

"FORGET HIM! The coffee table man... why must a beautiful piece of mahogany go through recycling!" Black then announced

"Ristar to room #2!" The funny star-like dude, with arm stretching powers, used his hands as crutches to limp there. Red then called for Bowser

"Dr. Bowser sir! You are needed in room 2!" Bowser bid farewell to his 5 year old opponent, Max, and went to attend Ristar. Ganondorf and Sonic walked out of room 1, shaking hands with each other.

"Thanks Ganon!" He ran out of the clinic while placing a lump sum of cash on the main desk. Ganondorf put his strangely glowing hands, full of dark aura, on his hips proudly. The Bros. yelled in disbelief.

"WHAT! Impossible! Was that a satisfied customer?"

* * *

At Sonic's House...

Sonic was taking a rest when he slowly rose from his bed, waking him. His usual blue coat of fur was a darker tone and was consumed by dark aura.

"I...am...the ULTIMATE LIFE FORM!"

* * *

Shadow's place...

Shadow snapped awake in horror. Rouge was beside him in bed, patting him on the back.

"I felt... a disturbance..."

* * *

Clinic...

Dr. Bowser just finished up with Ristar and walked out to announce. He was looking more down than usual.

"Its happening tomorrow..."

"WELCOME TO CENTRAL PARK!"

"SHUT UP ALREADY!"


	8. Chapter 8

"Get your stupid fatass up that platform!" Bowser complained at his WarioLand game. Ganondorf was looking over his shell at the gameboy.

"He is a fat lard isn't he?" As soon as Bowser finished the stage, he saved then turned it off to go attend some patients.

"Ness was it? Come with me to room 6 or in other words... the x-ray room." He walked a boy with a red hat and striped shirt into the x-ray room. Bowser then placed Ness on a table in the middle of the room and surrounded him with x-ray scanners. "Ok, this may sting a little..." He walked out of the room and turned the scanners on HIGH.

"AH!" Bowser waited for the scanners to go *DING!* then went back in. He picked up the results and was shocked.

"Whoa! All your insides are fried! What happened to you?" Ness was toasted head to toe.

"THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH ME! YOU JUST FRIED ME!" He hopped off the table and started to chant. "PK... FI-"

"Whoa Whoa! No need for that now..." He needed his profit from his customer but there is a possibility of a lawsuit. "Hmm... how about you give me the money for the procedure or I'll have to resort to..." He pulls out a final smash ball.

"..." He pulled out his wallet but it was in ashes. "... SuperHealing!" The ashes in his hand turned into a cool cash card. "You take credit?"

"Yes... Yes we do" Bowser snatched it and scanned out twice the amount of money needed. "Yep... good day. Now move along kiddo." He shoved him out of the room and threw the cash card at him. While walking past the front desk he snapped his fingers, whispering.

"Life Up" The smokey texture disappeared and got his colorful frown back and scampered out of the clinic. Red took the chance to take the spotlight,

"Looks like he played with too much FIRE" Black followed,

"Must've cost him a lot of PSYCHIC POINTS!" Yellow exasperated,

"You've been playing too much with MOTHERnature bro" Then Green finished it out,

"I like PK Fire!"

"You fools!" Ganondorf appeared in front of the Koopa Bros. and slapped them across their faces, "You low life fools shouldn't be taking in the spotlight like you're some kinda main characters!" Then they sobbed in unison,

"Yes sir.." Suddenly the door flew open and some kind of robot dropped to the floor, seeming barely alive. "Oh my koopa! Bowser there's an emergency!" He stormed out in a panic, noticing the robot and took him in room #3.

He threw him on top of an operating table and swung open his notepad and trusty pen to write down the diagnoses. He spun the red robot round and round trying to see the problems with it... beside all the bullet holes all over its body.

"Hey Bowser this patient dro-" Ganondorf ran in with a peculiar abject in hand.

"What did I tell you about calling me just Bowser..."

"Um... -"

"That's right... It's just that for some odd reason I need to be called by my tittle more often... This place is called 's Clinic and I'm the doctor!" He clutched his pen tightly then turned to meet eyes with the object, "What the heck is that?" Ganondorf took a long look at it and shrugged. As they desperately discussed what it could be, the red robot with cool black shades got up, rubbing his head,

"That's my shiel-" Oil splattered out of the abdomen and he coughed up some oil, "Excuse me... It's my shield and I would like it back please." Bowser and Ganondorf glanced at the character. Ganon walked up and handed him the shield while processing his character...

"Wait a minute..." He whispered, "The shield and the red robot... can it be..." He grabbed robo dude by the shoulders. Robo dude coughed up more oil,

"That hurts you kno-"

"YOU"RE PROTOMAN!" There was a long silence...

"Yes..." He whipped the spit from his face while pushing him away, now sitting up on the table. Ganon started having a spaz attack with a girlish fan boy scream,

"EEEEEEE!" Protoman raised a brow while questioning,

"You a fan?"

"but of course bro... You are like THE Protoman. Megaman's lone bro and coolest robo master of them all!" While the two of them talked, kept writing his diagnoses carefully and finally clarified,

Hm... It seems as if I can't fix you..." He wrote a recommendation for 's mechanical zone, "I mean you really expected me to actually bother with fixing robots AS well as creatures?"

"Yeah..." He took the recommendation slip and examined his data base for its location, "Hell no that's like 5 freaking zones away from here! You think I'm in a condition to walk there?!" pondered and decided,

"Fine... You can stay here for the night... but no funny business alright?" Protoman kept coughing up more oil,

"Don't think I'm in a condition to fool around..." Ganondorf reached for a TV remote next to Proto and turned the TV behind him on. A commercial with Warioman popped up:

"Hello fellow Station Square citizens! It is I Wario with a whole new world of fun with more microgames!" He grabbed someone off screen and pulled him out into view... It was !

"Um hi..."

quickly grabbed the remote and turned it off,

"So... the commercial aired..."

What will happen to Protoman?! And what of the commercial?! All on the next chapter of DBZ.. oh wait more like 's... ZenClinic! Sorry... tried to make that work...


End file.
